Social Media

Do pictures say something?

Many pictures with the spouse:

Either the poster is truly in love with him/her or pretending that things are normal between them to avoid rejection by society, or to gain acceptance or to fulfill the desire for a perfect relationship. People may show off a perfect relationship to hide insecurity, turbulence in the relationship, or to increase their own status by linking it to their partner’s achievements or to put social pressure on the partner to stay together.

Numerous pictures with children may be a temptation to show a perfect family with good bonding. It may be an effort to show off that children are well behaved, well rounded, skillful, disciplined, loving, and respectful. These pictures may also be a real reflection of a perfect, stable family.

Obsession with selfies may indicate the need for recognition and approval from others, inner emptiness, loneliness, and depression. It may also indicate a lot of pride in self or overconfidence. Selfies can work as boosters of self-esteem.

Social media was introduced to stay in touch with friends and family. but paradoxically users are feeling more lonely in spite of spending a lot of time on screen. They are reluctant to talk to real people around them, many times even failing to acknowledge the presence of a person near them.

Screen addiction is not infrequent. There is a constant craving for posting, checking stuff, urge to keep up with things and fear of missing out (FOMO).

In the social media world, people are masking their sadness, loneliness, failures, setbacks, and pain. Most of the time people post happy pictures and positive thoughts even when they are broken from the inside. People who spend a lot of time on social media may miss the interaction with suffering and pain. It is hard for them to learn sympathy, empathy, compassion, and caring attitude.

The use of screens cannot be completely avoided but make sure that digital media works for you, and not the other way around. Browse for a set period of time and use screens responsibly. You should be in control and able to decide what you want from the use of screens and then periodically analyze if you are on the right track. Use it for your own benefit, and remember not to get used by it.

Avoid posting unnecessary things and revealing personal minute details. Control the urge to repeatedly check your phone. Engage with real people, do not get anxious by constantly thinking about the number of people who may like your post. Keep yourself free of this behavior. Regularly observe a screen free day or time. Step back and think why you are afraid of missing out, is it really important, is it making you anxious and lonely. Protect your real-world relationships. Social media is not an alternative option for intimate relationships.

Remember that online likes do not translate into real life admiration or relations.

To find out how many online friends really care about you, do this test—

Do not post for a few days and see how many of your online acquaintances reach out to you to see if you are okay or if you need any help. Do people miss you if do not post or they do not even notice your absence from social media? Develop permanent happiness inside you; it should not depend on your online pictures, status, and comments by strangers. Have an open and honest conversation with family members about screen use. Keep reminding each other of good online practices, safe behavior, and responsibility. Know the risks of irresponsible posts and unlimited screen time. Find something which all family members like and spend screen free time together.

Introduce some activities in your daily life like traveling, reading, walking, writing, cooking, sports, visiting friends and relatives, volunteering, helping the needy or simply look around, observe and infer.

Know that there are de-addiction centers and support systems to help.

How to stay responsible online?

Next time when you post something on social media, ask yourself what is the purpose of posting and will that goal be achieved by posting, are there any risks of posting, are you harming someone by posting?

Post with a purpose and learn from feedback and comments and do not develop a supercilious attitude of self-admiration.

Learn to navigate and keep going towards your goal with a well thought off and executed strategy.

Do not compete with others for similar or better online visibility. Everyone has different relations and circumstances. It should not lead to any high or low self-esteem.

Accept difference of opinions instead of waging a war on people who do not agree with you.


Bharti Raizada